Archie, Veronica, Betty, and Jughead stand in the dark holding flashlights, dressed in formalwear.

Riverdale Season 3, Episode 22: “Survive the Night”

OK, you know what? This episode was fabulous. Is it possible all we were missing this season was a really fun villain? Because holy crap, this week’s villain–who is, by extension, revealed to be this entire season’s superbaddie–is getting a kick out of her evil role. And in turn, I am getting a real kick out of the episode.

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Betty and Jughead look off to the side. Both wearing fancy medieval style clothing.

Riverdale Season 3, Episode 20 “Prom Night”

It’s prom night in Riverdale! Could I BE more excited?

Actually, this may sound a little unbefitting the supposedly intellectual, supposedly adult recapper who stands before you, but I was hoping for this episode to be MORE cliched. More fretting about who goes to prom with who. More meaningful dance scenes. There were some good scares and some great dresses, but all in all, I wanted it to be more Pretty in Pink, less Carrie. Alas, this is Riverdale. You don’t get to have this many plot twists if you waste too much time on prom antics.

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Chad Michael Murray, clad in white, stands between Alice and Evelyn, also clad in white, while they all smirk at Betty (who's facing away from the camera).

Riverdale Season 3, Episode 19: “Fear the Reaper”

I quite liked this episode! Highlights include badass women fighting, another badass woman pursuing her dream, and a twist in the Edgar Evernever saga that I totally didn’t foresee but which makes the casting of Chad Michael Murray even more inspired. Also there’s a Henry James reference that I’m rather embarrassed to report I don’t really get–and that would be the one reference this show would make that I’m qualified to comment on.

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Betty walks down the stairs of her house, which is filled with cardboard boxes and otherwise empty. She's holding a candle and wearing jeans and a sweater.

Riverdale Season 3, Episode 14 “Fire Walk With Me”

This episode continues to exhibit the same qualities as a bowl of plot spaghetti BUT, at least we get to hear Gladys Jones sing!

Previously on Riverdale: Veronica owed Hiram $75K for burning his equipment but also owed Gladys about the same amount for burning the equipment Gladys had prepaid for; Cheryl started a gang for Toni called the Pretty Poisons; Gladys told Jughead to quit the speakeasy and incorporate the Gargoyles for numbers, but Kurtz, the King of the Gargoyles (not to be confused with the actual Gargoyle king), was totes creepy, but then Gladys got him anyway; Archie’s life was under threat; Evelyn recruited Kevin to the farm and then also drowned Alice in a baptism.

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Profile of Kevin and Moose grinning at each other and holding on to each other.

Riverdale Season 3, Episode 12: “Bizarrodale”

Other than the fact that Jughead says “Bizarrotown” somewhere in the episode, I actually couldn’t figure out why this episode in particular got that moniker. I mean, no one even gets attacked by a bear or adopts approximately a thousand troubled youths or attends a fight club in a drained-out gym pool, so… not that bizarre, actually. In fact the real bizarre thing about this episode is that poor forgotten Kevin gets a plotline, so, maybe that explains the name.

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