The Great Dawson’s Creek Rewatch Project: Season 2, Episodes 16-18

We’re rewatching all of Dawson’s Creek in honor of its twentieth anniversary. Will require some mind-numbing. Drinking game rules can be found here.

Season 2, Episode 16 “Be Careful What You Wish For”

By Janes

Screen Shot 2018-03-25 at 4.39.27 PM

Recapping these episodes was a strange experience. Between his hilarious drunk antics in 2×16 and his sweet supportive side coming out in “A Perfect Wedding,” Dawson was the most shockingly tolerable version of himself. It was… disconcerting.

In “Be Careful What You Wish For,” Dawson realizes that he’s the least dynamic character on the show (take a shot for unusually apt meta-commentary!) and does his level best to be interesting for a whole night. And he actually sort of succeeds: he and Andie get drunk at a club and slur through a terrible improvised blues song. (It’s embarrassing because they’re so very white, although it must be said that James van der Beek, who got his start in Off-Broadway plays, has a surprisingly lovely voice.)

Then a belligerent Dawson destroys his surprise party with a cutting speech that points out every character’s flaws. Some of these are more fair than others; Dawson’s parents get a well-deserved smack-down for their petty bickering, while Dawson’s admission that he prefers Pacey to be the screw-up “because your life is supposed to be worse” is both cruel and completely true to his character. It’s painful to watch, but often hilarious, and maybe the only time Dawson shows any real personality. It’s great to see James show off his comedic timing–a little preview of his delightful work in Don’t Trust the B.

Meanwhile, Jack’s coming-out subplot continues to be a well-written and nuanced highlight of the show. This episode deals with the particular alienation of coming out in a supposedly “liberal” area: everyone is so busy accepting you that they forget to treat you like a human being. One girl tells him she thinks he’s “so brave” and that she “totally watched Ellen through that whole tumultuous year.” Another girl comments offhand that he’s “the first actual gay person she’s ever met.” This show was portraying microaggressions before that word was even in the lexicon.

In a bid to be the same as everyone else, Jack has an ill-advised make-out session with Abby. Joey, who has been dealing with the situation beautifully thus far, is understandably hurt and confused when she finds out. She and Jack have a wonderfully human conversation, in which he tells her that everyone has been accepting but are still treating him like he’s different from everyone else, that he doesn’t want to be “singled out” or “the Ellen of Capeside.” Then, the kicker: he says he wanted to believe that he could turn straight again because “the thought of being gay seemed like such a lonely thought.” My heart.

Notes:

 

 

  • On the eve of his 16th birthday, Dawson naturally has a “I’m turning 16” freakout (⅙ life freakout?). He says he’s still the same “whiny, adolescent, big-talking, little-doing loser I was a year ago.” Now, I’m all for a break from the endless Dawson praise, but he does realize that whining about this isn’t exactly helping his cause, right??
  • Dawson natters on about some “gay man, straight woman thing” (uh, what?) and warns Pacey to keep a close eye on Andie. Dawson, if you had actually learned anything from this, you would warn Pacey not to laugh at Andie and belittle her hobbies. Except, oh wait, Pacey would never do that. – Nerdy Spice
  • Pacey on the “gay man/straight woman thing”: “Oh yes, Dawson, it’s all part of the evil gay plan to keep the species from repopulating.” So progressive and dreamy.
  • Speaking of creepy dudes, Mitch shows up uninvited at the house to cook Dawson’s birthday pancakes as per tradition. Then he tries to get Gail to help him get a birthday present for Dawson on the morning of Dawson’s birthday. Dude, you’re divorced now. Gail doesn’t have to do your emotional labor any more, like reminding you to plan for birthday presents more than three hours in advance. – Nerdy Spice
  • Pacey and Joey are plotting a surprise party for Dawson! So cute! When Joey worries that she won’t do a good job, Pacey reassures her that the party will be great, and “the Leary household’s gonna be known as the Delta house of Capeside.” Awww! Then he asks her how she’s doing over the whole breakup thing. Let’s review: Pacey shows friendly concern even though he and Joey are still supposed to find each other annoying, whereas supposed “soulmate” Dawson is making fun of Joey for dating a gay guy. – Nerdy Spice
  • Andie’s therapist very unnaturally asks Andie what she “wishes for,” just so every character’s storyline can explicitly tie back to the title. There’s this thing called subtext, guys, or haven’t you heard?
  • Joey’s emotional reaction to Jack’s coming-out is so mature and well-written. She jokes about “turning him off women completely,” says that intellectually she “knows that’s not true but…” and then asks, “What am I supposed to do now?” As someone whose boyfriend came out when I was only a couple of years older than Joey, that sums it up.
  • Ty needs to shut up forever. That’s all.
  • Okay, one more thing–their kisses are so gross! I didn’t think that any couple on this show could be smackier than D/J, but I was wrong.
  • While he’s trying to guilt her into getting back together, Dawson tells Joey they’re “soulmates” (shot!) and that their love is “the only thing that makes sense to him,” which should probably be another addition to our drinking game.
  • Dawson also says, “If you and I are not meant to be together then I don’t know anything.” The comebacks write themselves. – Nerdy Spice
  • I love that Andie is so Type A that she is annoyingly perfectionist about her attempts to be imperfect.
  • Bessie’s crazy party outfit is kind of great. It almost makes up for her hideous mullet. – Nerdy SpiceBessie talks to Joey in a kitchen. Bessie is wearing a mullet, and a kind of brown paisley velvet long sleeved shirt.
  • RIP Dorky Jack hair 😦Screen Shot 2018-03-25 at 4.04.42 PM
  • “It looks like the transformation from John-Boy to John-John was all in a bottle of Dippity Doo” is the ninetiest nineties line that ever ninetied.
  • Speaking of people who need a jar of Dippity Doo… what is happening. – Nerdy Spice

    Jen smiles and is wearing extremely messy hair. Ty laughs behind her.

    Seriously, Michelle Williams is the only age-appropriate star of this show, but this haircut makes her look like she’s about forty. – Janes

  • Oh my God. Andie has body glitter all over her (ample) cleave. This is the most nineties of nineties. – Nerdy SpiceScreen Shot 2018-03-25 at 4.09.50 PM
  • Andie explains Freud’s id theory to Dawson in such a superficial way that she doesn’t even mention the ego, which I think is a concept Dawson could really relate to. Two shots!
  • Janes’ and my third sister used to pull the same trick Andie does by complaining that there’s not enough rum in her Coke to get free alcohol.
  • What’s the opposite of bi-erasure? (Gay erasure?) Whatever it is, it describes Abby’s speech to poor Jack. – Nerdy Spice
  • Pacey’s face of complete vicarious embarrassment when Dawson and Andie are murdering the entire genre of the blues, is hilarious. – Nerdy SpiceScreen Shot 2018-03-25 at 4.14.22 PM
  • It’s funny when Drunk Dawson admits in song that he knew about the surprise party the whole time, but if that’s the case, why was he whining about not having any plans for his birthday and making Pacey feel bad about being the “third wheel”? What a little snot.
  • After their performance, Pacey asks what’s “gotten into them tonight,” and then acts all shocked when he realizes that they’ve been drinking. I’m sorry… was there ANY other explanation for their behavior??? It’s a good thing he’s pretty.
  • Ty tells Jen that she’s “tempting” him into sexually deviant behavior just by kissing him and, I don’t know, existing, and she tells him that’s a “load of crap.” Good for her.
  • He then says that “with [Jen’s] history,” kissing clearly isn’t just kissing. Um, fuck you, first of all, and second, take a shot for some good old-fashioned slut-shaming!
  • Again, Dawson comments on Jen’s “revolving boyfriends,” (shot!) when she’s only had one boyfriend this whole season! (But on the other hand, James van der Beek’s delivery of “I wanna party with you!” is amazing.)
  • Dawson making fun of Joey needing to find herself by searching for her under the table – mean, but hilarious. – Nerdy Spice
  • I realize he’s super drunk, but Dawson just straight-up kisses Joey without her permission, which doesn’t age very well. He’s lucky that all she did was push him into that cake.
  • I love when Drunk Andie laughs at Drunk Dawson falling in the cake! I laughed too. Drunk people are funny! – Nerdy Spice
  • Yuck, Dawson’s vomit is surprisingly realistic and gross. I won’t screencap it here, just take my word for it.
  • After slut-shaming her a little more, Ty tries to give Jen some line about “maybe someday in the future” and she immediately comes back with, “Anyone who could make me feel like this doesn’t deserve a maybe.” Good for her!
  • Bye forever, Ty. We won’t miss you.
  • Joey tells Dawson that “our lives have always been so intertwined [10 shots!], I feel like you partially invented me” and that “scares [her].” Um, yeah, it should scare you, that’s like some Ex Machina shit right there.
  • And yet, the ending, where Joey sees the snow out the window, still gets me every time. What’s wrong with me??Screen Shot 2018-03-25 at 4.53.01 PM

Highlight:

Drunk Dawson is delightful throughout, but the most low-key hilarious moment is probably when he finds Jack making out with Abby, breaks out into drunken laughter, and goes straight into another verse of butchered Ray Charles. Drunk Dawson is infinitely better than sober Dawson. 

Most cringeworthy moment:

Dawson’s entire birthday speech was intentionally cringeworthy in a great way, which is an unusual achievement for this show. Other than that, it was probably Dawson’s entitled and whiny speech to Joey about how they’re clearly soulmates and should get back together. To quote sassy season one Joey, “You do know she broke up with you, right?”

Most wrongly used five-dollar word:

During his ⅙ life freakout, Dawson says that he, as a singular person, feels “eternally lost as a species on this planet.” Wut.

Drunkenness level:

Fifteen shots–almost as plastered as Dawson and Andie.

Season 2, Episode 17 “Psychic Friends”

By Nerdy Spice

Dawson stares at a framed photo of Joey.

This episode is mostly about the brutal crushing of Dawson’s ego, so clearly it’s pretty enjoyable. As much as we make fun of Dawson for said ego, I have to feel bad for him here. He’s clearly still bruised over Joey choosing Jack over him, and also bruised that Joey’s now single but still won’t get back with him (I suspect as an internet feminist I’m supposed to call this male entitlement, but I think many of us have been there, male or not). Then his new film teacher, Miss Kennedy, offers to watch his film and eviscerates it, calling it lacking in plot (not a surprise) and lacking in emotion (somewhat of a surprise). A devastated Dawson goes home to sulk and stare at photos of his ex, as one does.

The main conceit of the episode is that everyone goes to some kind of festival whose purpose is not very clear, but which I will call The Festival of Flirting With Ancient Lumberjacks and Buying Jam and Learning About Safety And Their Fortunes And Also Silent Films. The most important thing, though, is that there’s a fortune-teller. Andie in particular takes her way too seriously and freaks out that her fortune wasn’t positive enough, forcing the ever-patient Pacey to comfort her over her stupid made-up problem. Jen tries to get Grams to use the festival to find a fella, even giving Grams a fairly impressive makeover. Even when the ancient lumberjack she’s interested in cancels the date, Grams still declares that she has a newfound interest in living her life and moving on.

Meanwhile, Joey and Jack meet a handsome stranger who takes some glam photos of Joey—but then turns out to be interested in Jack. This inspires Joey to go over to Dawson’s in a fit of nostalgia—or maybe it scares her into thinking she’s never going to find a straight guy attractive again.

  • We open with Joey watching Dawson’s finished movie. “In my entire life I have never been so moved,” Joey gushes. As you probably know, Poe’s law states that it’s impossible to parody a Creationist in such a way that someone won’t mistake it for the genuine article. And similarly, it’s impossible to parody everyone’s constant undeserved praise towards Dawson in such a way that makes it 100% clear we’re in a dream. Despite having seen this episode at least a few times (season 2 is one I very rarely rewatched, but I know I did a couple full marathons where I conscientiously sat through this whole season despite its dearth of Pacey/Joey scenes) I honestly wasn’t sure, despite how fatuously Joey was praising the movie. But it does turn out that Dawson iis in the middle of  a nightmare in which it turns out Jack has stolen both Joey and (worse) the directing credit on his movie.
  • Dawson’s film class is now being taught by Madchen Amick, “Miss Kennedy,” who seems to always be cast in the role of someone’s Beautiful New Girlfriend. In this case, she is destined to play this role in Mitch’s life, but we’re getting ahead of ourselves.
  • Joey is doing her best to make lemonade out of her gay ex-boyfriend lemons by trying to get Jack to objectify guys in the lunch room with her. She says there’s nothing sexual about it, that it’s just shallow. This is shortly followed by a drawn-out “ooooh” when she sees a guy who looks like Leonardo DiCaprio. Nothing sexual, huh? Jack doesn’t want to act out this kind of cliched nonsense, but they do agree that they aren’t bothered by being friends even though they were dating just a month ago.
  • Andie is trying to wear Pacey down into going to the festival so that she can have her fortune told because she actually thinks fortune-telling is real. Somehow, it’s not clear how, Pacey dressing up as a safety mascot at said festival will enable that–it’s not clear why. But when she isn’t able to wear him down with sheer peppiness, she bribes him with something too dirty to even euphemize, whispering in his ear until he gleefully agrees.
  • Joey’s hat game (she wears this beret to hang up art at this mysterious festival of Art, Safety Tips, Fortune Telling, and Silent Films) is on point this season. I’m guessing it’s to show that she’s all Artistic now. Joey wears a super cute brown hat, standing in front of her drawings.
  • She tells Jack she misses getting kissed, and Dawson magically shows up because he’s helping Madchen Amick with a silent film display.
  • Joey confirms that Dawson is a “Leo” (again, as in DiCaprio). Take a shot for gratuitous praise of the main character!
  • Joey’s fortune is that her old friend Carol from kindergarten has the pencil she borrowed from Joey… and that there’s a lot of pain in her past. (That does make Joey perk up, because, you know, her mom died and everything—Take a shot for playing the dead mom card, even if technically the fortune-teller is playing the card!) The lady goes on to tell Joey to take every opportunity that comes her way, and that she is going to come to a fork in the road, and to follow her heart. Oh, and there’s a tall dark man coming. Soon. Well I think this pretty much proves Andie right that fortune-telling is legit. I mean if that isn’t real science, what is?
  • After offering to watch Dawson’s film, Miss Kennedy tells Dawson not to be intimidated by her ambition and then tells him he has a “romantic spirit.” Shot for unprompted praise of Dawson!
  • Joey is making fun of the fortune-teller when a hunky guy shows up and tells her her art is amazing. The Chords of Immediate Attraction play in the background. The most absurd part? He’s the whitest guy you’ve ever seen and his hair is so light a brown it could honestly be called dirty blonde. And Joey thinks he’s the tall, dark stranger from her fortune! Only on the WB would this guy ever be called “dark.”A white guy with light brown hair stands in front of Joey's drawings.
  • This festival also includes Grams running a jam stand. What IS this festival?
  • Jen remarks that she and Grams are “both destined to face the future as single women.” Isn’t it kind of tacky to flippantly refer to a recent widow as a single woman?
  • Miss Kennedy is showing Dawson some rare films she has, and when he names people like Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton, she remarks that he’s a “true film buff.” Shot! If he’s a film buff for knowing that, I guess I’m a nuclear physicist because I’ve heard of neutrons and protons.
  • Dawson takes the opportunity to LITERALLY say that no one understands him because of his movie obsession. Oh my God. Vom.
  • Jack encourages Joey to have an adventure with the Dark Stranger, so she goes on a coffee date with him. He listens to her ramble about her art for a few minutes before saying that she’s “incredibly beautiful.” She tries to change the topic by asking about his art, and he takes the opportunity to say that he loves faces… and touch her face, which makes her grimace. THEN he tells her she has sensuous lips. He keeps saying stuff like “This may be completely out of line here, but…” but like, saying that doesn’t make it NOT out of line unless you STOP TOUCHING HER when she grimaces.
  • Pacey is trying to do his safety puppet show when he gets into an “I know you are but what am I?” fight with a tiny freckled human whose emotional age is approximately the same as Pacey’s. Heh.
  • Joshua Jackson was like 20 here, so I feel only mildly dirty saying that he is WORKING this safety officer uniform. Pacey walks by the fortune-teller's sign in a black puffy jacket and a black officer's cap.
  • Joey agrees to meet Colin the Face Groper for photographs in an abandoned school building that has some costumes backstage. Jack, wisely, asks what she knows about this guy and Joey blithely says nothing. Luckily Jack insists on coming with her in case the guy turns out to be a “tall dark psychopath.” In real life this would SO end with a date rape, like, the fact that this turns out to be just an oddly handsy gay guy is a pretty happy ending.
  • There’s a really funny moment where Jack makes a crack about French kissing and then, trying to be cool, pops some popcorn in his mouth—but misses.
  • Jen kindly offers to dye Grams’ hair before her date even though the date has a shock of white hair fit for Einstein himself. But while doing the dye job, instead of being nice and supportive, Jen just tortures Grams with talk of condoms. Ugh, this kid is such an asshole!An old white man with a white beard and mustache and white hair that is extremely thin on top and long and wavy in back.
  • Joey starts out the photo shoot in a ballgown (looking absolutely gorgeous) and has her classic French twist, then a leopard coat and knee-high boots, then a boho Annie Hall type outfit. By the end of the montage (hooray for montages!) she’s totally into it.
  • After the sun has set on the festival, Pacey runs into the fortune teller and she gives him a free fortune: he’s not really as strong and confident as he seems. Suddenly, now that she’s poked the giant can of worms that is Pacey’s impostor syndrome, poor Pacey isn’t so convinced that fortunes are fake. (Shot!)
  • Joey tells Jack she told the photographer that Jack would be by the fire, but he is not pleased about being pimped out by his recent ex, understandably, and says that he doesn’t have to go out with someone just because he’s gay. He also doesn’t appreciate Joey’s joke about his need to develop gaydar. But later he brings her coffee on some pier somewhere and they make up amongst the twinkle lights. He kisses her on the forehead and puts his arm around her. It’s very sweet.Joey and Jack sitting facing away from the camera with arms around each other, twinkle lights all around.
  • Miss Kennedy has finished watching Dawson’s movie, and says, “…It’s fine.” OUCH. Dawson, disappointed with the lack of lavish praise, assures her he wants to learn and asks for the truth. So Miss Kennedy rips it apart. She says it’s uninspired, the story’s non-existent, the dialogue’s not believable, and it lacks emotion. Then she gets meta: “It’s a preposterous soap opera about a bunch of teenagers who talk too much. We’ve seen it before, all that self-aware, self-referential hyperbole filled with cliches that are disguised as send-ups.” Um, OUCH AGAIN. (What do you want to bet that a lot of that was the writers bitterly quoting insulting reviews that they themselves had received over Dawson’s?)
  • Dawson’s look of devastation, though, is pretty sad. I defy anyone who’s ever tried to be creative to not sympathize with him. Closeup on Dawson looking upset.
  • Miss Kennedy tells him he’s “sweet” and thus Hollywood will eat him for breakfast, so she’s trying to save him from that, or something? Take a shot for the unwarranted declaration of Dawson’s sweetness, even if it’s interspersed with absolute brutality!
  • Dawson walks home looking absolutely shellshocked and finds Miss Kennedy getting into a car with Mitch. Talk about evil stepmothers! And he sees Joey selling her painting and getting a big hug from Jack, who unlike Dawson is capable of supporting other people. I’m not going to lie, I wouldn’t take that well either at this exact moment, if I were Dawson.
  • When Pacey learns why the fortune-teller upset Andie it’s as stupid as you think: Andie wanted to hear that her life would turn out fine, and the fortune-teller said it wouldn’t, and now she’s sad. Pacey somehow holds back his laughter and comforts Andie that she has a brilliant and magnificent future ahead of her. This is the dumbest problem a TV couple has ever had. [Yep. It definitely gives that stupid rocket in Gilmore Girls season seven a run for its money. – Janes]
  • When Joey finds Colin to turn him down on Jack’s behalf and admit that she didn’t have a right to accept on his behalf, Colin confesses he’s on the rebound from breaking up with a longtime friend turned lover. Omg you guys, do you think there are parallels to Joey’s life?! “At the time I could think of a million different reasons, but now I can’t think of any,” he says. (Um, Joey, I can promise that as soon as you do get back together, those reasons will come rushing back!) Just in case you didn’t get it, Colin also says he wishes he wasn’t in such a rush to move forward. Do… do you think that’s like a parallel with Joey and Jack? Just a guess.
  • Jen finds her Grams on the pier staring at the same fire pit. Her date had to cancel. Jen apologizes for pushing Grams into going out with him, but Grams says she’s fine and Jen did something wonderful. She made Grams realize she can’t live in the past. Grams does look quite pretty. (We recently saw her in Anastasia on Broadway by the way, a full eighteen years after this scene, and she sounded AMAZING. This lady is immortal.)
  • Dawson finds the fortune-teller cleaning up and complains to her that he’s going to die loveless, friendless, and obscure. The fortune-teller takes pity on him and pulls out a card: it’s the lovers card. “A soulmate walks in your path… she knows you well, she sees into your soul, she feels your pain.” Shot for the soulmate reference! She tells Dawson he’ll find her again and leaves before Dawson can pay her for her nonsense.
  • Dawson sits sadly in his bedroom as sad music plays. The montage continues with Joey staring up at Dawson’s window and Dawson staring at a photo of her. He picks up the phone to call her, but, of course, she doesn’t pick up. When he turns out the lights, she gives up and turns back towards home, taking a sad solo canoe ride over the darkened creek. (Great camera work here, by the way. And everything is improved by being turned into a Sad Montage.)DC 217 sad montage
  • Where she finds… her dad, waiting at the door. The episode ends on Joey’s incredulous, “Daddy?”

Highlight:

This episode gloriously included two montages—a Fun Photo Shoot Montage and a Sad Ending Montage Of Missed Connections. I can’t resist either genre of montage!

Most cringeworthy moment:

You think you’re about to get a mournful little ending montage, but nope. Instead, Dawson SMASHES THE BEAUTIFUL DIORAMA JACK MADE. I am actually shocked by this. He let Jack make this intricate tiny model of Capeside, for free presumably, which clearly took many many hours of work and probably a lot of expensive materials too, and then he smashed it because he was in a bad mood? Jeez!!!

Most wrongly used five-dollar word:

I would say “self-referential hyperbole” doesn’t make a whole lotta sense.

Drunkenness level:

Six, almost entirely made up of shots taken for gratuitous praise of Dawson.

Season 2, Episode 18 “The Perfect Wedding”

By Janes

Screen Shot 2018-03-26 at 11.21.37 PM

My little teenage heart adores this episode. I’m no longer a D/J shipper (obvi), but “A Perfect Wedding” is still an iconic episode that stands the test of time. It may not be the best episode of the show, but I would argue it’s the zenith of the Dawson/Joey relationship, a reunion so adorable that the writers needed all manner of soapy, drug-dealing, arsonist contrivances to break them up this time around.

But before we get to that, let’s talk about the Potters. This episode was really firing on all cylinders, because all of the reactions to Mr. Potter’s release felt so terribly real. Bessie, the oldest child who maintains the family mythology, is ready to pick up right where they left off, to an unnatural degree. Joey is angrier and more vulnerable, since her dad missed her formative years, but doesn’t feel secure enough in their relationship to express those feelings. When she eventually lashes out at him for tearing their family apart, it’s totally deserved (he probably deserves worse, actually), and yet Mr. Potter’s character is nuanced enough that you feel for him. 

Meanwhile, Dawson is so supportive and selfless this episode, he almost seems like a different person. Usually, Dawson uses the fact that he’s known Joey since childhood as a way to guilt her or hold her emotions hostage, but this time he simply takes the opportunity to be there for her in a way that no one else can. He doesn’t freak out when she confides in Jack initially–as he usually would–but instead contents himself to wait in the background until she comes to him. When she does, he manages to give her heartfelt advice without making it all about him. He validates her feelings while also reminding her how strong she already is, and tells her he’ll always be there for her, which is exactly what a so-called “soulmate” should say. This might be the only episode that makes me remember why I used to ship them in my foolish youth.

This all culminates in a well-earned reunion kiss at a fancy wedding. I still cry every time I see that scene, which I guess is no surprise, but even Nerdy Spice tears up when “Feels Like Home” by Chantal Kreviazuk comes on. (What?! I’m human! – Nerdy Spice)

Notes:

  • After last episode’s soul-crushing, Dawson fishes for compliments by showing his film to his mother, and then forces her to give him even more gratuitous compliments by feigning skepticism that she can be objective. Take a shot!
  • I’m happy to see that Queen of the Negligee Gail owns a pair of normal stripy pajama pants, like the ones she wears while watching Dawson’s film. – Nerdy Spice
  • It sucks that Joey and Jack totally lose their friendship after this season. It’s such a nice friendship and Jack just gets her. – Nerdy Spice
  • Sixpence None the Richer’s “Kiss Me” plays over the end of the Jen/Abby reconciliation. I smell an unrealized slash pairing. – Nerdy Spice
  • I love Andie complaining about bridesmaids in hideous dresses. Pretty sure if you look up “hideous dresses” on Encarta 98, you get a picture of Andie’s closet. – Nerdy Spice
  • Mr. Potter says that he was sure when he got out of jail, Joey and Dawson would be “an item.” Aw. What a cute, embarrassing dad thing to say.
  • What would you call Bessie’s hairstyle? “Prison Guard Bridesmaid”? “Business on the Bottom, Party On Top”? “I Baked My Curls In a Muffin Pan And They Overflowed”? – Nerdy SpiceDC 218 hair
  • “Every peony in place,” Pacey describes this wedding. Dirty!
  • I hate, hate, hate everything about Andie’s bizarre pretend wedding hatred. The only thing more sexist than portraying all young girls as being obsessed with weddings is portraying all young girls as “cool girls” who pretend to hate weddings but actually love them. Unsubscribe.
  • When Pacey sadly says that money can make moments like this perfect, Andie complains that her rich WASPy family only “looked perfect” and “At least your family’s imperfection reflects reality!” Wow, classist snob: party of one.
  • Is it mean to say that one look at the groom makes me totally understand why the bride wanted to jump out a window?

    Screen Shot 2018-03-26 at 10.21.49 PM

    The audition for Superman’s weird-looking cousin is that way.

  • Why is this bride wearing seventeen pounds of glittery dress and ZERO makeup? Why does she lingeringly kiss Jack on the mouth when she thanks him for helping her out? So many questions. – Nerdy Spice
  • “So I talk to her for twenty minutes and she wants to jump out a window,” Dawson remarks. Well sure. – Nerdy Spice
  • Jack very tells the bride that real love is better than the dream of a “soulmate,” and then turns around and tells Dawson that he and Joey are definitely soulmates (shot!) and she needs him to “force” a connection with her. Going from “emotionally mature” to “emotionally unhealthy” to “almost criminal” within one scene is so very Dawson’s.
  • Dawson is also blaming Joey’s “pride” for the fact that she won’t take him back. Is that what the kids are calling “good judgment” these days? – Nerdy Spice
  • But on the bright side, he tells Dawson that his and Joey’s lives are “inextricably intertwined,” for the very first time! 20 shots!!
  • The only time I’ve ever related to Andie is when she ruined a cake by gesticulating wildly. – Nerdy Spice
  • Also, from the sound effects, it seems like while he’s putting this cake back together Pacey is literally sculpting three quarts of white frosting with some crumbs thrown in. Good job props people. – Nerdy Spice
  • Why does Mitch choose such a weird way to tell Dawson he’s dating his film teacher? What a clown. – Nerdy Spice
  • But also, I love that Dawson tells his devastated mother that the real crime in all this is that his dad’s new girlfriend “called his movie insipid.” He really has a talent for making literally anything about himself.
  • Okay, I know Pacey is supposed to be industrious, but that top layer looks INCREDIBLE. As in literally, not credible. Are we seriously meant to believe he did this with some random can of frosting? Is this foreshadowing for his sinfully boring chef plotline in season five??Screen Shot 2018-03-26 at 10.47.02 PM
  • Jen’s coat is a) covetable and b) the PERFECT outfit for someone who’s trying to embrace a Bad Girl reputation. – Nerdy SpiceDC 217 coat
  • Dawson very sweetly considers his mother’s feelings, asks her to dance, and gives her selfless advice! What is this nonsense??
  • I could listen to Abby imitate Grams all day. RIP.

Highlight:

Screen Shot 2018-03-26 at 11.16.41 PM

The iconic “Feels Like Home” dance, of course! Not only is the kiss itself adorable, but it’s preceded by a romantic wedding montage that matches the song lyrics in amazingly on-the-nose ways. Pacey and Andie dancing to a line about changing someone for the better, Joey and her father dancing to a line about “how lonely my life has been,” the stupid wedding couple dancing to a throwaway line because no one cares about them. And then, of course, Dawson and Joey kissing during the first “Feels like home.” Buckets!

Most cringeworthy moment:

Most things about this episode work, but Andie finally admitting that she was lying about hating weddings (ugh) and is actually a “wedding fanatic” (UGH) and then making a weird clingy joke about marrying Pacey when she’s sixteen years old (UGH!!!) probably takes the cake, no pun intended.

Most wrongly used five-dollar word:

Jack has “typically intuitive insight,” huh? How would you have insight that’s not intuitive? – Nerdy Spice

Most 90s soundtrack moment:

If you don’t know the answer to that by now, I can’t help you.

Drunkenness level:

23 shots! Worth it.


Previous installment here.

Next installment here.

Advertisements

5 Comments

  1. I love this article you have such a great narrator voice that kept me so engaged. Really want to watch this show now 😂 love the comments about how the show has aged as well.

    Like

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s